British Airways CEO Sean Doyle issued a formal apology letter to the CEOs of other airlines – all of which were male – for having to acknowledge that women can be doctors too.
After reports emerged of a technical issue on the British Airways website that prevented passengers identifying as female from selecting the title of Doctor, the airline was quick to issue a public apology while it attempted to resolve the issue.
However, in the wake of the incident, British Airways CEO Sean Doyle issued an apology of his own. In a letter addressed to other male airline CEOs in the industry (which represent 93% of all airline CEOs), he expressed embarrassment and regret at his airline being forced to publicly acknowledge that women can be doctors too.
In the note, Doyle stated,
Bad news, gents. Apparently, women CAN be doctors, despite what I’ve been told. And apparently it’s been that way for a few years now. I was even told that there are male nurses now, which is just weird, but whatever. Different times, right?
Yeah, anyway. So, now, we are forced to update our website so that people who “identify as a female” can select Dr. as their title.
And we had to issue a public apoliogy. My bad about that, dudes. Y’all might want to check your stuff too.
Just what we need, right? More “woke-ness.”
Anyway, drinks are on me at our Men-only golf club this weekend.” Text Apology to other airline CEOs from British Airways CEO Sean Doyle
Although unconfirmed at the time of publishing, rumors are swirling that Delta Airlines CEO Ed Bastien was so infuriated with Doyle’s public admission that he launched a container of Chik-fil-A ketchup toward the wall of his palatial Atlanta office. However, the size of the office was so large that the ketchup just landed on the rug.
No official statement from Spirit Airlines or United Airlines has been released, although reportedly American Airlines is just happy that this will distract from all of their staffing and flight delays that are ongoing.
The post you are reading is….satire