ATLANTA, GA — Delta Air Lines has apparently decided that modern geopolitics is best settled by letting SkyMiles-addled elites play an oversized board game in real life. According to a flurry of fresh leaks, the carrier will soon unveil nonstops from Los Angeles to Hong Kong, Atlanta to Riyadh, and (on weeks when nobody is looking) Atlanta to Tel Aviv. So forget diplomats — just flash your Medallion card, grab the dice, and roll for foreign policy.
Meanwhile, Delta PR insiders insist the leaked routes are merely “exploratory feelers.” Yet copies of the airline’s new game manual — Delta Diplomacy™: Long-Haul Edition — are already circulating on FlyerTalk. Reportedly, the rulebook smells faintly of jet fuel and Biscoff crumbs. That absolutely tracks.
Unboxing the Expansion Pack
First, pop the shrink-wrap and marvel at Delta’s commitment to sustainable gaming. Every MQM token is printed on recycled drink-coupon stock that biodegrades the moment you try to redeem it. Tucked beside the Gogo single-use Wi-Fi code (already 84% consumed) you’ll find three glossy Route Tiles:
- LAX → HKG — Leaked by One Mile at a Time and quickly met with Cathay’s politely combative “we welcome competition” vibe in the coverage at Live and Let’s Fly. Play this tile to blockade every Cathay lounge buffet you haven’t already raided.
- ATL → RUH — The oil-sheen showpiece, flagged at One Mile at a Time. When placed, you earn the coveted Endless Hummus Resource Card and trigger a Delta–Riyadh Air joint-venture press-release minigame.
- ATL → TLV* — The Schrödinger Tile. It exists in both “Paused” and “Resumed.” Check Delta’s live travel notice here before each turn. Flip a coin to see whether insurance, risk, or optics yank it off the board.
Additionally, the box includes the Travel-Waiver Wild Card. Play it to wipe the entire map and auto-email every opponent a “We’re sorry for any inconvenience” notice that links to Delta’s rolling advisory page here. As a final flourish, you get collectible Delta miniatures — ramp agent, gate dragon, and Sky Club bouncer — each pre-posed to explain boarding zones in 1:64 scale while ignoring your upgrade request.
Game Setup
Start at Atlanta Hartsfield-Jackson, Concourse F. Of course you do. Every great quest begins within sight of a Chick-fil-A that is inexplicably closed the day you travel. Each player receives one lukewarm Biscoff, two half-valid upgrade certificates, and a line-priority card that does absolutely nothing outside TSA PreCheck cosplay.
Next, position your Route Tiles. Use LAX-HKG to cut off access to Cathay dumplings and make West Coast flyers question life choices. Then drop ATL-RUH to unlock a petrol-backed magic-carpet corridor and bonus resource food tokens. Finally, perch ATL-TLV on the map’s edge like a nervous cat. For extra strategy depth, skim the leak roundup at Aviation A2Z; players who cite sources gain one additional move because literacy still matters.
Objective
Your mission is simple: capture all three hotspots and accumulate 1 billion SkyMiles. Achieve that and you earn bragging rights plus roughly one future Basic-Economy award seat to Albuquerque. Therefore, hoard aggressively.
However, new hotspots apply surge multipliers that change each round. Draw the Consultant’s Report twist card and half your stash converts to sad little MQDs. When that happens, you must spend three full turns in a CVG Sky Club line reflecting on the sunk-cost fallacy. For added realism, the game recommends you price miles using the skeptical tone deployed in Omaat’s leak writeup and the cautionary math flagged at Live and Let’s Fly.
Turn Phases
- Book — Attempt an award search. First price: 80k. Next refresh: 320k. Final screen: error. Even so, your miles are gone.
- Lobby — Roll a 20-sider:
• 1–5 = Righteous rage tweet about Gulf subsidies; lose a turn arguing with bots.
• 6–15 = Nothing happens; sip Biscoff latte and pass.
• 16–20 = Congressional hearing ends in your favor; take an extra turn and pocket symbolic regulatory goodwill. For background on why this matters, see the Delta–Riyadh Air tie-up here. - Issue Travel Waiver — Draw from the Crisis Deck. Then place waiver tokens on every connecting hub touched by current events. When in doubt, consult Delta’s rolling advisory here.
- Apologize on X — Corporate bot posts “Sry 4 any inconv.” Collect one PR Fatigue badge. Repeat as needed.
Optional house rule: apply a 5% mileage inflation at the end of each full round. Alternatively, compound hourly for the authentic SkyMiles life experience cited in commentary like this analysis.
Penalty Cards & Plot Twists
- Middle-Seat Misconnect — Auto-rebook to seat 34B. Your knees report structural fatigue.
- Fuel-Surcharge Surprise — Pay $650 cash or forfeit your next birthday. According to route-watch chatter summarized at View From the Wing, premium long-hauls are where “because we can” pricing thrives.
- Sky Club at Capacity — Wait three turns under a glowing “Premium Experience” sign while staff hand out thimble cups of water.
Looking for chaos? Shuffle in rare event cards. FAA System Outage resets the board to dial-up era screens. Pilot Contract Showdown forces all players to chant “industry-leading pay” before moving. And Cathay Retaliation Snack Embargo (inspired by coverage at Live and Let’s Fly) removes dumpling tokens from West Coast players for one round.
Victory Conditions
To win, you must bank 1 billion SkyMiles, keep at least one functioning AMEX credit line, and avoid Basic-Economy purgatory. Do that and you may declare victory. Easy, right?
• Receive a commemorative Delta Diplomacy™ metal luggage tag (retails for 97¢; shipping extra).
• Claim one upgrade certificate valid on flights under 500 miles, subject to weight-and-balance, gate-agent mood, moon phase, and whether the ATL train is broken.
• Enjoy lifetime bragging rights at family dinners no one asked for.
After the game, winners are encouraged to post 2,000-word Medium explainers on “How I Hacked International Travel With Board-Game Theory.” Then upsell a $499.99 webinar. Losers may console themselves by reading the “we paused, we didn’t pause, we resumed” roller coaster in the Times of Israel coverage. For extra pain, bookmark the pausing advisory here.
Pre-Order Now (Before United Rolls New Dice)
Order today for just 500,000 rollover MQMs. Delta promises to ship by Q4 2099. (Delivery window subject to schedule changes, government filings, travel waivers, and seasonal Biscoff supply.) If you miss the window, relax. There will always be another leak, another route tease, and another chance to turn geopolitics into game night.
Stay tuned to The Takeoff Nap for more high-octane aviation satire, loyalty lols, and board-game sequels nobody asked for.
- If you’re curious about the surprisingly low compensation for flight disruptions, check out Delta Passengers Receive A Mere 58 SkyMiles For Denied Boarding to see just how many SkyMiles Delta passengers receive when denied boarding.
- Discover the unique collaboration between Delta and Uber in Delta and Uber Launch ‘Delta Wings’ Rides and ‘Sky Meals’ Deliveries—Flight Attendants Dust Off Their Scooters and Safety Demonstrations, where flight attendants are gearing up with scooters for a whole new travel experience.