SAN DIEGO, CA – An active duty Coast Guardsman is furious after being turned away from early boarding during a recent flight out of San Diego Airport. The reason: the gate agent didn’t really consider the Coast Guard part of the military.
Skip McNutt has served in the US Coast Guard for just under 3 years. The YN3 rated McNutt serves as a member of the Personnel & Admin team in San Diego and reports to work every day in an office building sandwiched between an Asian Massage Parlor and a Dunkin’ Donuts not far from the San Diego Airport.
McNutt was recently given temporary orders to travel back to Baltimore to attend some additional training and found himself booked on a United Airlines flight out of San Diego. Despite having a middle seat for the duration of the lengthy flight, McNutt was thrilled to find out that United allows active duty military to board early which would give McNutt a decent shot at stowing his carry-on instead of having to gate check it.
However, according to witnesses, when the gate agent called for active duty military members to board, McNutt, who was bedecked in his crisply pressed Coast Guard Uniform, was rejected by the same gate agent who informed him that the policy only applies to actual members of the military.
For his part, McNutt was initially surprised when he wasn’t allowed to board, but after reflecting on the comments from the flat-top-wearing gate agent, he begrudgingly admitted the gate agent had a point. It was only after the flight had departed that McNutt started to get angry, at one point muttering to himself, “I went to basic training just the same as him. It was a full 3-day weekend, too, ok!? Psshhh.”
Later, the gate agent, identified as Carl Rogers, a retired Gunnery Sergeant from the United States Marine Corps, told his supervisor that he was just following the policy. “Everyone knows the Coasties don’t count, boss!” Rogers was overheard saying in the breakroom when explaining his actions. “It’s only actual military. I think I would know, ok!? I would have let a girl scout troop board before I’d let a Coastie.”
McNutt eventually did board his flight when Group 4 was called and was forced to stow his bag in the last row of the plane before swimming upstream to his basic economy middle seat closer to the middle of the plane.
Editor’s Note: Don’t worry, we love our Coasties. The author of this article (and owner of this satire site) is a Marine…and well, it’s kinda what we do. We insult each other’s branches. We have special rules for each other. Just be glad we didn’t take aim at the National Guard. So…relax. If you need this jarhead, I will be the guy in the airport with the flat top who is eating crayons.
On a more serious note, on this Veteran’s Day please take a moment to thank those who’ve served in the military sacrifice today – even the coasties.