Fake News Archives | Page 13 of 13 | The Takeoff Nap

WASHINGTON, DC - Despite airline mask mandates likely coming to a close soon, air rage incidents have not subsided and one flight attendant union is demanding a radical new approach: bodycams.

Smile? Flight Attendants Union Demands Body Cams for Its Members

by Anson HowardApril 15, 2022April 9, 2022

DALLAS, TX - Southwest Airlines announced a new feature for its top-tier flyers. Starting soon, A-List travelers on the budget airline will receive chauffeured car service when they are driven from gate to gate at most airports.

Southwest Introduces Gate to Gate Ground Transportation for A-List Flyers

by Anson HowardApril 13, 2022April 9, 2022

LONG ISLAND CITY, NY - The beleaguered airline JetBlue announced a new policy today that guarantees no more than 30% of flights will be canceled. The policy, which excludes Boston's Logan Airport, was welcomed by frustrated customers and their family members.

JetBlue reverses course, decides to not cancel as many flights today

by Lee BallouApril 12, 2022April 12, 2022

FRESNO, CA - In an attempt to bring the joy of the New York City Subway to the friendly skies, the new airline Air Fresno is offering passengers a special opportunity to fly in its standing-room-only cabin.

Air Fresno introduces standing-room only cabin

by Guest PosterApril 11, 2022April 9, 2022

SAN DIEGO, CA - A unknown travel blogger recently shared with his 17 followers that he has no idea who Richard Kerr is, or what Bilt is. Confused by the recent "Bilt" controversy, the blogger spent 2 hours reading negative comments on a competitor's blog and realized he can't get that time back.

The Travel Blogger

Travel blogger admits he doesn’t know who Richard Kerr is (or what Bilt is either)

by Lee BallouApril 9, 2022April 9, 2022

DETROIT, MI - A traveler aboard a Delta Airlines flight out of Detroit, Michigan expressed serious frustration about the incessantly long post-takeoff announcements by the flight crew after the plane reached 10,000 feet. Business traveler Glen Rhodes noted, in a now-viral tweet, that he was just trying to watch his movie, but the dang flight crew wouldn't shut up already.

Man trying to watch inflight entertainment seriously annoyed at all the announcements by the flight crew

by Lee BallouApril 8, 2022April 3, 2022

AUSTIN, TX - Billionaire Elon Musk has purchased 365 private jets to help avoid a college kid who is tracking his flight movements around the world. Each jet will move to a different spot in the world every day.

Elon Musk purchases 365 private jets, sends them in opposite directions every day to avoid kid who is tracking him

by Lee BallouApril 1, 2022April 1, 2022

WASHINGTON, DC - This week's repeal of the federal mask mandate on public transportation is creating unintended consequences.

Repeal of Airplane Mask Mandate Goes Awry

by Kyle StewartApril 1, 2022April 1, 2022

the-end-is-near

Airlines Through Fooling Around With Frequent Flyer Headaches

by Arpie FlyerApril 1, 2022April 1, 2022

ESTERO, FL - Rental car juggernaut Hertz is rolling out a new program for frequent renters at the storied company. The new service guarantees renters will not be arrested after returning their car. The new premium service is similar to their prepaid gas option.

For a fee, rental car company guarantees renters will not be arrested after returning car

by Lee BallouApril 1, 2022April 1, 2022